1. All lady-likeness will be out the window and you will have more gas than your husband, your children, the milk man, the mailman, and the mailman's mother combined.
2. The first trimester you will be so bloated that you will think that you must have "Good Year" written across your backside.
3. You have to be a professional acrobat if you want to clip or paint your toenails.
4. Your lower back will hurt so bad that when you wake up in the mornings it will take you 10 minutes just to bend over to put your pants on.
5. Your sweet, loving husband will probably start keeping track of the number of times you ask him to rub your back.
6. Varicose veins come in a really pretty shade of purple.
7. You will wake in the middle of the night with leg cramps that hurt so bad they will make your unborn child cry.
8. If you make it through the entire pregnancy without some sort of crazy skin something or other you have experienced a miracle, and you are one lucky girl. However, you should probably not tell other pregnant women because you might get hurt.
9. You don't have to ask for people's opinions to hear them anyway, and the number one thing they like to give their two cents about is your weight.
10. Your not supposed to, but you will want to eat your weight in chocolate, and whatever else you can get your hands on for that matter.
Bonus: You will be so emotional and irrational that you should probably buy stock in kleenex for all the times you'll be wiping your eyes and blowing your nose. It might be something as small as someone putting the milk on the wrong shelf in the fridge, but it will feel like the end of the world.
Like I said, these are just a few things I've learned.
While pregnancy is so wonderful and awesome, it can get pretty real, REAL fast!
Thank goodness I have a husband that loves me and can handle a lot! He's a good guy (and I didn't just write that because he told me he'd be reading my blog today- love you babe!)- He really is!
Have a good day!
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